post-christmas rant

It's been a while, and to be honest, not that much has happened. I saw panda's at San Diego zoo, I came home, Christmas came and went and I stayed confused about life.

Going back to Chris would be so easy, easy life, easy travelling too, and he is good to me--I know that. But it's boring, and I know it would be. It would be a mistake to go back, but he texts like he used to and it makes me miss that. I like having a second home, and a good man by my side. And then there is Elliot, perhaps everything Chris is not--easy on the eye for starters. Apart from when his top comes off, the hair and the weird skin is visible and I don't like it. But I have wanted him for as long as I can remember--it's a shame this dream just isn't how I wanted it to be. The personality is sweet, and he is loving and better in bed, there is no doubt about that, but for some reason I'm forcing myself to go over for a few days later and I don't know why, I should want to go, but Chris is in the back of my mind.

I'm not going to marry Chris, and probably not Elliot, maybe I should just enjoy the single life for a while?

SAN DEIGO

Yesterday we arrived at the Hostel which will be out home for the next few days, in none other than San Diego. I am looking forward to tomorrow because i will be fulfilling a life long dream of seeing the Giant Panda's in San Diego Zoo. However; we are currently sat in the hostel, attempting to figure out the finances for the trip- and who owes who money. It is very confusing, even Pete cannot figure it out.

San Diego is awesome, i could live here, and will one day. It's sunny-ish, there are lots of clubs and bars which is awesome, and i will be able to see Panda's whenever i want (:

yeahhh i think i could live here, and hopefully will.

Going to hooters tonight, which will be an experience none the less! And saw a dog parade today where all the dogs where dressed up! However i cant decide if this is animal cruelty or really, really cute. Pretty knackered to be honest with you--but i am so excited for life right now it is hard to focus on the tiredness i am feeling.

Anyway, next post will be full of panda's and my life will probably be complete!

proud of myself

Swallowed my pride and emailed both professors- i have nothing to lose, i will never see these people again!

And at least now i can sleep easy knowing i have dealt with the situations the best i can. I will now never check my SOU email again, because everyone know's the situation and what to look for! If there is a problem, imagine it can be sorted without my help.

pissed at myself

Today i have sucessfully fucked up my sociology exam, and put my 15 page paper in the wrong pile. The pile thing, i hope will get recognized, the exam thing--well i am fucked. Everyone is now hanging out, i however am in my room reflecting on the day and what my actions; and pondering how to sort things out. I could email my comm professor, but i don't want to seem pushy. Likewise, i could email my sociology professor and tell him i really struggled and hope it takes this into consideration. what i am actually going to do is probably none of this, i will just sit and watch gossip girl on my own and wait for elliot to email me back because that might make me feel better.

Tomorrow i will finish my 9 tribes paper and wait for tuesday night to roll around so i can find out my grades in the class- hoping i didn't fail and that my professsor found my paper.

it's dead week...

which means exams are next week. I have so much to do, yet for some reason i cannot be bothered. All i want is to be on the way to San Diego without worrying about work and exams. I got my conformation for my Camp America interview, and that just means even more to worry about what with finding references etc but, that i can do, because it is gonna be hellla fun this summer of i get to go!

Just about to get my pj's on, read about some globalization and modernity then have my weekly dose of HIMYM because last week we discovered robin was preggerzzz!

So as Barney says, this weekends challenge of working and revising is accepted!